8 Tips Post Adoption Resource Exchange (ARE)

By Kathryn Connors, Community Engagement Liaison  

As prospective adoptive parents begin sort through all the emotions that come post Adoption Resource Event (or ARE), it is important that you continue to equip yourselves during this next phase in your journey. The waiting period can be fraught with anxiety and uncertainty, but with the following tips, prospective adoptive parents can bring calm, purpose and meaning to their journey. 

So here are 8 post-ARE tips for prospective parents: 

1. Educate yourself:
   So often many share that the wait for a potential match is the hardest as much of it is out of your control. Taking the time to continue to educate yourself on every aspect of adoption, including trauma, special needs, attachment, and community supports will be a benefit during this time. Use this time to your advantage by continuing to educate yourself around key matters within the adoption field. Having an understanding of the adoption process and its intricacies can help navigate the ups and downs of the waiting period with greater ease.  

2. Embrace self-care:
   I know, no one wants to hear this but taking care of yourself, both physically and emotionally, is critical during the waiting period. Staying active, engaging in hobbies, and maintaining relationships with loved ones can all play a positive role in the waiting process. This is the time to build your community and learn coping skills that will last you a lifetime. Our AFCCA team has put together a resource on restorative time, self-care’s sister, in this AFCCA Caregiver Training video.

3. Connect with other prospective adoptive parents:
   Building connections with others going through a similar journey can be very helpful. Support groups, online forums, and local adoption networks can be a great source of comfort and support during the waiting process. At Adopt4Life we have monthly support groups, access to one-on-one supports, resources including Snack and Chats, webinars, blogs and podcast!  

4. Consider your financial options:
   Raising children can be costly, so it's essential to prepare financially. Explore options for financing adoption, such as the sibling subsidy, Disability Tax Credit, RESP/RDSP and more. Talking to your local CAS to learn what supports are available for ongoing therapies and supports are crucial. 

5. Focus on your relationship:
   Use this time to deepen your relationship with your partner. Building a strong and supportive foundation will help you navigate any challenges that may arise during the adoption process. If you are adopting as a single person, now is the time to focus on building your circle of support! Adopt4Life has a thriving single parent group that can help.  

6. Build your community:
   Developing a tapestry of supports is an imperative part of the journey. It’s essential to have a support network to turn to; a community of friends, family, and professionals who understand your unique situation is crucial. In episode 7 in season 1 of our Stronger Together podcast, our community member Tess shares how she’s accomplished this especially as a single parent.

7. Prepare your home:
   Even before a match, use this time to prepare your home and make it welcoming to a child. Consider the practical aspects of transitioning a new child into your home, such as safety measures and sibling dynamics. 

8. Validate all your emotions:
   Sounds cheesy, but it's true! While waiting for a match, it's easy to feel discouraged or doubtful. Know that these feelings are normal and all a part of the process. Trying to keep a positive and hopeful attitude can help you stay motivated and excited about the adoption process, but it's not always that easy. Reach out for support – we are Stronger Together.  

The opinions expressed in blogs posted reflect their author and do not represent any official stance of Adopt4Life. We respect the diversity of opinions within the adoption, kinship and customary care community and hope that these posts will stimulate meaningful conversations.